Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Cookies

Sorry if this post makes you hungry.

Cookies. If you made me some, I officially love you until they're stolen from me. Probably by you. But cookies aren't just a normal gift you give just anyone. I've come up with reasons I would make cookies, and reasons The Fresh Prince [of Bel-Air] would make them. Here goes:

1. Can I? Please?
        You want to do something you normally wouldn't be allowed to do. Default to bribery.

2. I want your forgiveness.
        I messed up. And I can't find the words. So have some cookies.

 2b. I want out.
         I messed up. And I can't find the words. And this punishment I find a little excessive. Have some cookies.

3. I want your favor.
        And these cookies are going to work better than cash. Mostly since I used my family's secret toll house recipe. And I know you like cookies. Everybody likes cookies.

4. I want to give you joy, then steal it out from under you!!!!
       Do I need to explain? This is entertainment for me. Your sadness after I steal and eat your cookie brings a demented smile to my face. And then you realize that there are eleven more. :-)

5. I like you.
        I give you these cookies to say that I enjoy our friendship. And remember, I only used one like. Strictly platonic. Now, then, if I used two...

6. I like like you.
        Go on a date with me. These cookies will make you like me more, increasing my chances. And I already heard the cousin card. Not gonna work this time, girl! I have cookies!!!

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